


just so that no one will ever know

by nickybottom



Category: Epithet Erased (Cartoon), The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: Epithet Erased AU, F/F, Prom/Epithet Erased Crossover, canon up to episode 4 because who would have thought THAT CAR CRASH WOULD HAVE A PICK-UP, like it's more prom-related than ee related but i had to get giovanni in here, or prom au i guess?, split perspective between emma and alyssa at least for the first bit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:20:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21667339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nickybottom/pseuds/nickybottom
Summary: Alyssa Greene just wants her Epithet gone. "Gay" is a bit too on the nose for her life, and if she can get rid of it, it'll make everything much easier. The Arsene Amulet is her way to do that. Good thing it's being stored at the Sweet Jazz City Museum.Emma Nolan's joined a terrorist pyramid scheme with one of her best (and only, since she got kicked out) friends. He's convinced that the Sweet Jazz City Museum will have untold riches, and she just doesn't want to get killed.or, the epithet erased AU.
Relationships: Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan, Emma Nolan & Giovanni Potage, Giovanni Potage & Molly Blyndeff
Comments: 5
Kudos: 23





	1. the plan

**Author's Note:**

> okay, some context- epithet erased is an animated series where some people have words assigned to them called "epithets" which give them special powers in relation to that word.  
> the prom is a musical about lesbians.  
> title is pulled from the epithet erased theme song bc i'm generic like that.
> 
> initially we were gonna have alyssa in molly's sort of position and emma as a banzai captain but like, i just wanted emma and giovanni to be disasters together. it's better this way. hope you enjoy!

Emma was 9 when she figured out her epithet. She was in her music lesson, and her teacher said that she needed to actually play a bit more _forte_ this time, and suddenly every cell in her body was screaming, because that was it! That was what her life had been defined around!

So she played it a bit more forte, but maybe too forte, because the ringing in her ears was a bit much, but who cares? It was her epithet, it was her life, it was her thing! 

(Her parents invested in ear plugs after their daughter came home, chirping about how she knows her epithet, it’s forte, and it means really loud!)

Greg’s the one who pointed out that forte has two meanings. “It’s something you’re good at, too. Like, playing guitar is your forte.”

And so it was. Emma Nolan’s forte was playing her guitar, but forte.

* * *

She was 12 when it happened. She was sitting in church, next to her mom, and the pastor was talking about how it was a terrible thing to be a homosexual. And then he said the word gay.

And then Alyssa Greene knew her epithet.

The pit in her stomach grew larger with every moment of that sermon. She couldn’t be gay, her epithet couldn’t be _that_! It was against God, and even worse, against her mother. She knew what had happened to Adam when he came out, no matter how much her mom tried to deny it. And now, having a kid whose epithet was the thing that she hated most?

Alyssa was kind of screwed.

When they got out of church, her mom asked if she was okay, and she said, “Of course, Mom. The sermon today was really enlightening.”

And her mom nodded, and Alyssa knew that she was going to have to hide this. It would be easy. She could fake being a mundie for the rest of eternity. Maybe. 

* * *

Emma got kicked out when she’s 16. She went to her grandma’s apartment in Sweet Jazz City, and tried to forget everything that occurred in Edgewater. 

It was funny. She came out to one person at the high school, suddenly everyone was bullying her, and the month after, she was on the street. Of course Shelby would tell everyone.

But Sweet Jazz City was nice, she supposed. Lot more crime than Edgewater, lot more things to be careful about. Lot more stuff to get, if you could figure it out. Lot of ways to hide shit from Gran, no matter how much Emma loved her.

She didn’t use the epithet much anymore. Only so she could yell loud enough for Gran to hear across the apartment. She’d been too out, and too loud, and too proud in Edgewater, and that got her what? Emotional trauma?

And then, one day, she was loitering outside of a McDonalds, when a guy walked up to her.

“I’ve been loitering in front of the truck over there,” he gesticulated towards the truck, pink hair getting messed up, “and I just wanted to say, your loitering skills are really good!”

“I- uh- thanks? I was kind of just chilling. Don’t want to go back to my Gran’s yet.”

“Yeah, I get that. My parents are total jerks!” She didn’t know how to respond to that, so there was an awkward silence for a moment before he continued, sticking his hand out, “I’m Giovanni Potage.”

“Emma Nolan.” She took his hand and shook it. “If you’re expecting me to put out, I’m not gonna. I’m a lesbian.”

He blinked, and though he slumped for a moment, he immediately straightened back up, “That’s okay! I’m bi. And I respect your orientation and support you!” He emphasized it with finger guns, and she let out a small laugh.

“Thanks, dude. Do you want to, like,” she tilted her head back. “eat, or something?”

“I would, but I’m saving my money so that I can become a Banzai Blaster!”

“Oh. Well, if you get something cheap, I’ll pay for you.”

She leaves that day with his number, a better idea of what the Banzai Blasters are (they’re a pyramid scheme. it’s a fact.), and a spring in her step that she hadn’t had since before all of this began.

* * *

Emma Nolan was a cautionary tale of what would happen if Alyssa came out. Emma had been nice, and Alyssa had felt bad, and she was pretty sure that she’d apologized to Emma once, about the whole thing. 

It wasn’t much, just an, “I’m so sorry this happened to you, is there anything I can do to help?”

There was nothing she could do, of course. She was the closeted daughter of the queen of the PTA, the ruler of her life.

But Emma Nolan had smiled at her, and said, “Thanks, I don’t think there’s anything, unless you have a way to prove to my parents that I’m straight.” And then she’d laughed, and though there was bitterness tinged in it, Alyssa Greene liked that laugh.

* * *

“Are you kidding me, Ben?” All of the Banzai Blasters were sitting around Emma’s Gran’s table, Giovanni at the head, and Emma was pissed. “What do you _mean_ , your mom won’t drive you after five?!”

“She said that she had to work on some stuff from home...and help my sister with homework...and she just didn’t want to do it. Why can’t you drive me? I deserve it, after all!”

“Because I gotta drive the boss, and Car Crash, because he obviously can’t, and Spike and Crusher, because we’re pals!”

“And we’re on the way.” Spike added.

“And they’re on the way! You’re on the other side of town, Ben! Get a damn ride!”

“Emma, no cussing in there!” her grandma called out.

“O-of course. Sorry, gran.”

“Ben, the only way you’re going to get a cool nickname is if you can get a ride for tonight. Got it?” Giovanni asked.

“I can get a ride! Just before five.”

“We could just sit outside the museum for a while. Do reconnaissance.” Crusher suggested.

“I don’t know what that means, but good idea, Crusher!” Giovanni said, and Crusher preened under the praise. “That works for you, High Note?”

Emma smiled at the nickname. “You know most things work for me, Boss. I get off work at 4, so we’ll be good.” They nodded at each other, and then Emma nodded to the table. “So, if meeting at 5 outside of the Sweet Jazz Museum works for everyone, I think we’re good?” 

The rest of the Blasters generally affirmed, and Giovanni officially ended the meeting. The Blasters left, and Emma was sure she heard the beginnings of an argument between Car Crash and Ben, but decided to completely ignore it since they were leaving. As long as they didn’t argue tonight, it would be fine. She sighed once she heard the door close. “So, this is actually shaping up to go well.” Emma said, looking at Giovanni as she stretched in her chair. “Ben’s a little sh-craphead, though.”

“Maybe Craphead should be his nickname?” she snorted at that. “Seriously, though, Em, thanks for setting up everything. Maybe you should be the captain around here…” he stared down at the table for a moment, more put down than usual. The “responsibility” of being a Banzai Captain had been getting to him lately. She figured it was probably rough, having to deal with all of the bureaucratic shit. That was why she set herself up in the back, the support to his leadership. It was much better than being in the spotlight.

“Oh, God no. I’m decent with the set-up stuff, but I freeze up when it comes to actually doing anything. You’re way better at dealing with _them_ , and actually doing things. ‘Sides, I certainly can’t do what you can with a baseball bat, dude.”

He grinned at that, and pushed his chair back. “Well, one of us needs to actually be good at leading. And batting shit- er, stuff. Sorry, Ms. Nolan.”

“You’re fine, sweetie.” Emma’s gran walked in, grabbed a cup, and looked at the two of them. “Now, what are you kids doing tomorrow?”

“Visiting one of Sweet Jazz City’s museums!” Giovanni lies. Well, not technically, but Emma figures that not sharing the full truth is kind of a lie. “There’s an after-dark special deal thing, so us and the boys are gonna go check it out.”

Emma could tell that her gran didn’t entirely buy it, but wouldn’t question. “Well, stay safe, y’know?” She filled the cup with water, and glanced back at Giovanni. “Do you want to stay for dinner?”

“Nah,” he grabs his coat and throws it around his shoulders, “My mom’s making steak, I think. See ya tomorrow, Emma. Have a good night, Ms. Nolan.”

“See ya, Gio.” He steps out, and it’s just her and her gran.

“Don’t do anything too illegal, alright, kiddo? No piling 7 people into your car.”

“Of course, Gran.” she sighed. Tomorrow would be good. It had to be.

* * *

In college, Alyssa Greene figured out that she didn’t much care for God. It was a cruel fucking trick, what he pulled with the epithet—not that she cared about “sin”, but that she cared that she only liked girls, and her mother would end her if she found out. Or at least take away her financial support for college, which was basically ending her.

Which was why she hatched the worst plan in existence. The Arsene Amulet was being stored in a museum downtown, and she was going to take it, get someone to take her epithet, and be freed from the whole thing. Then she could happily return it, and begin life as a mundie who didn’t have to worry about being outed by her powers.

It was technically a crime, but as long as she didn’t get caught, it’d be fine.

“So, like, you’re sure you’re gonna be good getting a ride home from the museum?” Shelby asked her as they get ready for bed.

“Yeah, it’ll be fine. I can call an Uber or something, if worse comes to worse.”

“I just don’t get why I can’t come pick you up when it closes. Like, you can’t really stay late, right?”

“Well I- I- uh,” Alyssa floundered for an excuse for a moment, but then one stumbed out of her mouth. “I have- I have a date. After. Well, the museum is the date, and then we’re going to dinner. So they’re both the date?”

“ALYSSA! How’d you get a date? Is it with that one guy who was flirting with you in Psych?”

She...had a guy flirting with her in psych? “Uh- yeah! Be...ric. Beric. He’s cute.”

“He is! I hope you have a good time,” Shelby paused, before leaning over. “I can leave you with the car, if you want to, y’know…” she winked, and Alyssa immediately scooted away.

“Nope! This is a first date, Shelby, and I’m not gonna do that tomorrow.”

“Well, at least let me help you with make-up or something.” Shelby started rambling about different shades of blush, and Alyssa nodded along, trying to think if she could sneak a crowbar in her backpack.

* * *

Emma was pretty sure she should of been more worried than she was, that day. Work actually went well, for once. No kids tried to break any instruments, her music lessons went okay, and she got out right at 4, just in time to go home, grab her uniform, and haul ass to Giovanni’s house.

“You have your guitar?” He asked before even getting in.

“Of course. You have the Soul Slugger Doom Bat?” He nodded and hopped in shotgun.

“You know it. Stole Mom’s sharpest knife and everything.”

“Hell yeah, man.” They high-fived before she went to pick up the rest of the crew.


	2. the museum date (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma questions her life, her sanity, and why this night is going the way it is.
> 
> Alyssa questions why a girl from her high school is in a terrorist organization, and why she's feeling things all of a sudden.
> 
> or: the one where we actually get into the plot of the show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so updates! minor episode 5 spoilers: car crash has a car. i'm going to fucking scream this is what i get for writing while the show is still going. i gotta figure out how to work THAT out jesus christ car crash why did you do this i thought you just crashed ben's car bc you didn't have your own!!!  
> i'm prolly gonna go revise chapter 1 soonish because i didn't vibe with some of my giovanni characterization.  
> eventually i will make character sheets for emma and alyssa! i'm still trying to figure out some of the anime campaign stuff but i will get back to that once i'm not working constantly.

Alyssa stared at a painting of a blonde girl for approximately four hours. She watched at least three tours go by, each led by the same snarky dark-haired woman, one of which was interrupted by a guy in a sweater vest. His epithet was barrier. He yelled it pretty loudly. 

He also talked about the Arsene Amulet, which was nice reassurance that it was around, even if it wasn’t out yet. 

The only other real notable thing was some glasses kid who _also_ seemed semi-interested in the amulet. She swore she recognized him from somewhere—maybe he was some high school kid who took classes at the college?

Nevertheless, no real issues. She slinked into the bathroom at five minutes ‘til closing, as announced by the snarky woman, and sat on the toilet, scrolling through her phone. Just wait between two and three hours, then sneak out of the bathroom and grab the thing.

* * *

Three hours of waiting later, and Emma was done. Giovanni had wanted to wait until midnight, Crusher had started trying to flirt, Ben was complaining about some crap, and she was pretty sure Car Crash was eyeing the wheel.

“Uh, boss, I think we should go soon. They’re getting antsy, and,” she paused to come up with a lie, “my gran texted me asking if I could bring her home milk. I gotta get that home by midnight.”

He looked up at her, disappointing Crusher, who was trying to compare their hand sizes. “Well, if Betsy needs milk…boys!” he yelled, and they all looked at him. “We’re going a bit ahead of schedule. We all know the plan?”

They all nodded, and got out the boys got out their pea shooters. Emma grabbed her guitar, and swung the case around her shoulder. Guitar safety was important, after all. 

Flamethrower stepped forward to be the first to shoot through the glass (he’d called it, saying it was kind of like fire) and suddenly there was an explosion of glass. Jesus H. Christ, that was a lot of glass. And too much noise, to be honest. Nevertheless, Giovanni hopped through it nearly immediately, and she was forced to follow, so they could do their _**Super Epic Entrance Monologue**_. 

“ _ **Greetings, Sweet Jazz Museum! We’re the Banzai Blasters!**_ ”His voice echoed through the museum, augmented by her epithet. In addition, she added a sick-as-fuck guitar riff, ignoring the multiple yelps of pain and crashing noises behind the two of them. “ _ **And we are here to rob you blind!**_ ”

He began a monologue about how the museum people should all fear him, but she immediately cued in on the girl across the room from her quiet mumbles into the phone. “Uh, hey, boss?” She asked him, but he was kicking a potted plant. The girl noticed her at that point, and waved. She waved back. 

“I, Giovanni Potage, leader of these fearless Banzai Blasters,” he paused, and she blinked, before letting out another sick-as-fuck guitar riff as they posed. “have come to steal your precious treasures!” she turned his voice back up. “ _ **Tremble before me!**_ ”

He paused and glanced around. “Wait, where is everyone?”

“I was trying to tell you during the monologue. There’s a kid over there.” She elbowed him, and he looked across the room to the girl.

“I think the museum is closed for the day,” the kid suggested. 

“Well, obviously, everyone must have run off! We are the Banzai Blasters, after all! The baddest of the bad…” he trailed off, before immediately commanding, “pose with me, minions!” One more sick-as-fuck guitar riff for the books as they all posed.

Shorty grabbed the phone again, and quietly said, “I’d like to report a robbery.”

The list of swears that came to Emma’s mind was not appropriate for the kid to hear, but every swear she knew was going through her head as Giovanni souped the phone and crushed it. They were screwed. This was ruined. Everything was going to fall apart because of a tattle-taling little kid. Gran wasn’t going to see her ever again, because she was going to go to prison, and—

“High Note?” Crusher shuffled to stand next to her. “You doing okay?”

Giovanni was yelling at the kid about epithet stuff. Chill. Fine. Great. The police might not come, the phone was gone. She struggled to put her guitar into its case before it got broken. By the police, who were surely coming.

“I’m fine. Just saw all the terrible outcomes of this in one moment, and couldn’t deal. I think I’m gonna,” she glanced up to see Giovanni holding the kid aloft. “go and listen to make sure no one else is here, real quick. Like we planned, y’know? Tell the boss I’m off, once he’s done dealing with the kid.”

Crusher nodded and gave her a quick pat on the back as she walked off. She just needed to breathe, really quick. It had been a long evening already, and it had, what? Not at all started? That was fine. This was fine. Everything would be fine. She made her way a few rooms over, sat on the ground, stared at some dinosaur bones, and breathed. It would be okay. No police would show up, and they would get out.

As she settled on the ground, she quietly waited for the noise in the other room to fade away a bit more. As it did, she closed her eyes and focused. There were the boss and probably some of the boys. The other guys, talking, complaining about Ben. There were loud footsteps—heavy, she supposed, in one of the back halls. Probably a security guard she’d need to deal with. And then—she strained to hear it, and then used her epithet to increase the volume in her own head—quiet footsteps. Either the kid got out, or there was someone else here. Those were definitely increasing in volume, which meant that they were coming towards her. That was fine. She turned the footsteps back down, and gave herself another few moments to breathe. 

* * *

Nothing was going well for Alyssa. She was supposed to be the only one here, damn it! And then, after 20 minutes of wandering to try and find a storage room, she heard a guy start yelling about Banzai Blasters, and though she didn’t know a ton about the city outside of the college life, she’d read reports about the Banzai Blasters, and how they did terrorist shit, and basically, she was going to die here tonight. Better to die here than to die in prison though, she supposed. Even if prison would be safer, more comfortable, and less terrifying than this museum. That was fine. This was going to be okay, if she could just find a storage room.

She turned a corner and sighed. She was back in one of the rooms near the entrance, which was probably nowhere near a storage room at all! All there was in the room was dinosaur bones and—

“Emma Nolan? From high school?” The girl immediately looked up at the name, seemingly startled. “Are you one of the Banzai Blaster guys?”

Emma pushed up off the ground, nearly stumbling for a moment. Alyssa instinctively felt the need to go and support her, but what if she was one of those Blaster dudes? Nevertheless, Emma got up and leaned against the wall.

“Uh, hey, Alyssa.” she seemed sheepish, almost. “Yeah, I’m one of the Banzai Blaster guys. We- we’re generally harmless, though.”

“But you’re literal _terrorists_!” Emma winced a bit at that. Alyssa didn’t understand why—they were terrorists! She’d read news reports about their whole thing! “I figured that stuff would be rough after you got kicked out, but something like this?”

There was a pause in the conversation as Alyssa watched her. Maybe bringing up Emma’s being kicked out was not the best idea. Especially when she probably had a gun. Alyssa scanned her over, noticing the holster on her belt. Oh, shit, Emma Nolan from high school had a gun.

Emma seemed to not notice Alyssa’s realization of her imminent death, though, simply asking, “Did everyone know that I got kicked out?”

“Y-yeah. Please don’t shoot me.”

Emma blinked, then looked at her belt, where her gun was. The gun that she was going to shoot Alyssa with, clearly. “I- uh- I don’t really use the gun much. Usually if I have to fight someone, I’ll use my epithet, and besides, why would I attack you? You’re just here, in this museum, after hours.” She paused, seemingly processing it. “Why are you here, in this museum, after hours?”

“Long story, I guess. Basically, there’s an artifact being stored here that’ll fix my problems. I just need to get it, dip, fix some stuff, and return it tomorrow.” She nodded to emphasize the easiness of her plan, before accusatory looking over at Emma. “Why are _you_ here after hours?”

“Giovanni—my boss, I guess—just got promoted to Banzai Captain, and for his first mission he decided we were gonna come here and steal shit. So, here we are. To steal shit.”

“So why are you here, and not...committing theft?”

Emma sighed. “Well, we found a kid here too, and she called the cops, and I kind of, y’know, had to mentally process that. Giovanni’s a great leader, but he’s terrible at thinking ahead. Someone has to realize the cops are going to show up.”

“The- the cops are showing up? I can’t get caught! My mom will kill me!”

“Imagine how my gran will feel. If I have to explain what I’m going with my Saturday nights, I think I’m gonna die.” Emma sighed and pushed herself off the wall. “Listen, the boss just needs to grab some shit to be happy, and then I can grab the Blasters and we can go. I don’t know anything about your artifact, but—” A crash in the first room, followed by a scream, caused Emma to freeze up. 

“Are they...good?” Alyssa asked. 

“Probably not. Actually, let me rephrase; absolutely not.” Emma glanced in the direction of the front room before looking at Alyssa. “Do you want to try and go through all of that, or do you want to try and find a better exit?”

Alyssa blinked. “You’re going to help me get out?”

“Of course. I’m a decent person. ‘sides, less witnesses for Gio’s apparent fuck-up, less shit I gotta deal with later.” She sighed and started walking away from the front. “There’s gotta be a back entrance or something.”

Alyssa fell into step behind her. They quietly wandered the museum for a bit, before she got tired of the quiet and asked, “So, how are you doing?”

“Right now, or in general? Because right now kinda sucks, but in general, stuff’s been good. I’ve got real friends now. Not like in Edgewater.”

“I’m sorry about all of that. I mean, I know I couldn’t have helped, but still…”

“It’s okay. I mean, Shelby was a real bitch to me, but like, that wasn’t your fault.”

Oh. Oh shit, yeah, Shelby was the one who outed her, Alyssa realized. Shelby, her roommate. Shelby, who thought she was on a date right now. With a guy. What had she gotten herself into? She couldn’t tell Emma that, of course. But she could try to continue conversation. “Still, though. Things are better in Sweet Jazz City?”

“Yeah. I live with my Gran. She’s cool with the gays. I work at a music store during the day, and I’m trying to save up enough for college, eventually. The Banzai Blaster fees take a bite into that, but it’s worth it to support the boys.”

“That’s good. I mean, the terrorist thing is kinda shake-y, but I’m glad you’re still into music and stuff!” Alyssa chirped. “You were really good back in high school.”

Emma looked back at her, almost shy for a moment. “You paid attention in high school?”

“Of course! Emma, you were an amazing musician! Your performances at all the school events were one of the things I missed most once you left.” Alyssa smiled whole-heartedly at her, and Emma looked away. Oh, god, that probably sounded weird. “Not like, in a weird way, though. Just in a casual, music appreciator way.” Saved it, Alyssa.

“I didn’t think that you noticed…” Emma trailed off, before adding, “or that anyone noticed! At all! Honestly, I thought no one really cared when I left.”

“ _I cared_.” Emma stopped, turned, and looked at her, and Alyssa could feel _something_ stir in her. It was probably just anxiety from this whole thing. Not the way that Emma sort of looked cute in the half-light of the museum, or the shy way that Emma was looking at her now. Just anxiety. 

They stood there, like that, in the quietness of the hall, for a moment too long. Alyssa felt that she needed to end the moment, or something would happen, and she couldn’t afford that right now. “A-anyway, though. Uh, are you feeling less anxious?” 

Emma blinked and turned. “Yeah, I think so. I mean, me and the boys are still absolutely fucked, but I can deal. I just want to get you out of here so I can make sure they’re okay.”

Alyssa sped-walked to catch up to her. “I’m sure they’ll be fine. I appreciate it, by the way. Like, you helping me find a way out and all.”

“Of course. It’ll be nice for when we need to go, too. It’s much easier to help one person get out than to herd a bunch of cats to the exit.” Emma ran a hand through her hair nervously. Alyssa was pretty good at reading social cues, and she could tell that she was still pretty clearly anxious. She didn’t want to push, though.

They walked in silence for a few minutes, until they found a nice, big room. A step into it, and Emma froze. “He’s still here? Then what happened back there? I- shit, okay.” She took a step forward and raised a hand. “Giovanni!”

* * *

Giovanni stood up from the bench he was seated at, and grinned at the two of them. “Emma! I’m glad you weren’t captured by the barrier guy!” 

“The...barrier guy?” she blinked and glanced at Alyssa, who nodded.

“The guy whose epithet is barrier. I saw him earlier," Alyssa added, "when I was getting the tour.”

The short girl that Giovanni had been sitting next to—oh my _God_ , that was the girl who had called the police—quietly got up. “You were on one of the tours too?”

Alyssa smiled at her. “Yep! You were a part of the class there on the last tour, right? I think I saw you and your dad?” 

Shorty sadly nods. “Yeah. But my dad kind of left me here...”

“But Bear Trap’s been an integral part of the plan!” Giovanni patted her head, and then blinked, looking between her and Emma. “Oh, Em—High Note! This is our newest recruit, Bear Trap!”

She loved Giovanni. She loved that jackass so much. But did he _really_ need to recruit the kid who had almost led to their downfall immediately as the plan began?

Whatever. That was fine. This was all fine. Just breathe, Emma. “Hey, Bear Trap. I’m High Note. Or Emma, I guess.” she stuck out a hand to shake Bear Trap’s, and the kiddo took it immediately. For a moment, all of Emma’s thoughts were quieter. It was nice. She breathed in, and the world was quiet, and she was good. She let go, though, as society dictated, and everything went back to regular, loud volume. She glanced back at Alyssa, and realized that she still hadn’t been introduced. “This is Alyssa, from high school. Alyssa, this is my boss, Giovanni, and Bear Trap.”

Alyssa waved at the two of them, and Bear Trap waved back, but Giovanni grabbed Emma and pulled her aside. “Are you okay?” he quietly asked. 

“Yeah, why?”

“Well, you left in that first room, and I know you have anxiety, and I know that your high school experience is _also_ a major trigger of that anxiety. If I need to do something, I can…”

“No!” Alyssa and Bear Trap, who were looking at one of the—bears, Jesus Christ—looked over at them. She dropped her voice. “Listen, I appreciate the concern, you know that. But Alyssa’s cool. She was one of the only people who was nice to me in Edgewater, and she’s nice, and pretty, and funny, and—”

“You have a crush! Oh, High Note, you know I support you in everything. I, Giovanni Potage, will be your wingman,” Alyssa glanced back over. Oh no. “in everything, including romance!”

Emma grabbed his arm, shaking him. “Oh my god, shut up, Gio! She’s right over there, you jackass!”

“Oh! Oh. _Oh_. Ignore that! I, Giovanni Potage, will not be your wingman, in anything!” he winked. “I am just a certified bad dude, here to emotionally support _no one_!” Oh, he was such an idiot. She was so screwed. How was she going to even fix this shit? She just needed a distraction—

“So, you guys must be the Banzai Blasters, huh?” They all looked up at a short kid, standing on top of one of the displays. 

Not quite the distraction she wanted, but she’d take it. Thank you, sheep kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hot take of the evening: the banzai blasters are a pyramid scheme but they also, on multiple levels, remind me of a fraternity (mostly in a decently good way but with a statement on the higher ups of frats/banzai blasters).   
> anyway hit me up on tumblr @revivetheprom, I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you have a lovely day/night!


	3. the museum date (part 2: this time, it's academic)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma learns that not everyone wants to get cursed swords to throw at girls.
> 
> Alyssa learns that her epithet can be useful, if only against bears.
> 
> or: everyone learns about the horrors of fursonas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay this one has a lot of action from the actual show, which i feel ehh about but it needs to happen. sorry it's probably boring to ee readers! i hope prom readers appreciate it.  
> also i've finished the show! and watched some of anime campaign! they both slap! btw i have no idea where this fic is gonna veer off to once we hit the end of season one but we'll figure it out!

“Who the heck is that?” Giovanni asked. Alyssa knew this kid. She knew him, how the _hell_ did she know him?

Bear Trap grabbed at her sleeve. “The boy! From earlier! Miss Alyssa, you remember, right? He was in my tour group!”

“Yeah, I do. I gotta know him from somewhere else, though.” She did. College, college, college. How was he related to the college?

“You’re trying to steal the Arsene Amulet, aren’t you?” Oh, god, the kid knew. “You know, I don’t go easy on criminals who get in the way of my research!”

“Oh!” Alyssa grinned as she remembered. “You’re that guy who graduated from SJU at 14, or whatever!”

“Well, you aren’t gonna stop us, kid.” Giovanni smirked.

“I’m not- I graduated at 15- why do I even bother?” He pointed, and a hush fell over the room as some weird gold dust began to fall. Emma tried to grab at it. It was kind of cute.

“Is this snow?” Giovanni asked, elbowing Emma. “Wait, why is it _yellow_?” Emma immediately dropped the hand that had been trying to grab the alleged pee snow, and tried to rub it on her uniform, to which Giovanni elbowed her again, stage whispering, “Not on the uniform!”

It didn’t seem like pee snow, Alyssa mused. And the kid seemed too full of himself to be just dumping snow on them.

Molly, next to her, seemed to have a revelation. “Guys, be careful! The dust’ll make you go to sleep!” Emma immediately dropped, as Giovanni let out a vague noise of questioning. Alyssa crouched a bit, but quietly listened. “I bumped into him earlier, and some of the dust rubbed off on me, and then I passed out! To be honest, I thought it was weird dandruff, but I think he’s inscribed! He must have some kind of sleep epithet.” 

Welp. Guess they were gonna take a nap, Alyssa supposed. Well, until Giovanni declared that he could defeat it with his Demon Energy Aura, and Emma immediately shot back that she could defeat it with her Wave of Loud-Ass Noise, and then there was steam and complaining everywhere.

Alyssa wished her epithet was something cool like demon energy or loud. Then it would be worth it, and usable, and—

“Now that we’re all a team,” Giovanni pulled an arm around her, dragging her into a group huddle, “I can tell you about my secret techniques! Including my special move! 13 is my lucky number—Emma knows this—so every 13 hits I get in, I unleash a super attack!”

“Oh, wow!” Molly exclaimed, before asking, “Is that, like, soup related?”

“Nope, I’m just awesome!” Giovanni kept rambling, and Alyssa zoned out to analyze the situation. Was she included in the team? She had been here for approximately 5 minutes, and she was in a team. A terrorist team. With a cute girl, a soup guy, and a lovely kid. At least she was going to get to the amulet, probably.

A chorus of “baa’s” pulled her out of her reverie. Oh, that was a bunch of sheep. And Giovanni was throwing soup at them, to no avail.

“Oh, there’s too many of them! Bear Trap, High Note,” he glanced at her, “You need a cool villain name, attack!”

Emma was pulling out a guitar, and Molly yelled about not having a weapon. Alyssa watched as Giovanni gave a 12 year old a gun.

Maybe she didn’t need a cool villain name. Maybe she didn’t need to be in a team with a guy who gave kids guns? Maybe, maybe, maybe.

And Giovanni pulled out a bat. With a knife taped to it? That required deeper analysis, but Alyssa couldn’t care about that! She grabbed the crowbar she’d stuffed into her backpack, and brandished it.

“W-why do you have a crowbar?!” Emma yelled over the “baa’s” of the sheep.

“I got it off of Amazon!” Alyssa knew that didn’t explain anything, but the crowbar had no real explanation anyway. It was just her only weapon that seemed reasonable and fit into college “no weapon” policy.

A sheep bumped into her. She quietly poked it with the crowbar, and it “baa”’d. Oh.

“They seem...pretty harmless, boss.” Emma noted.

“Yeah, it’s not bad at all!” Giovanni grinned.

“They just bump into you! I have a friend who would love this, actually.” Molly smiled softly, and Alyssa felt warmth in her chest from the wholesomeness. “It’s so soft!”

Giovanni was half through voicing a thought when one bit her. “Hey, that hurt—”

“They nibble hard!” Molly yelled.

“Oh, god, not the costume! It took me hours!”

Alyssa was the first to hit one. It went flying across the room and hit the wall with a satisfying _thump_ , before dissipating. Giovanni seemed to have the same idea, hitting them with his terrible knife-bat and chanting “Thirteen!” before finally getting one to dissipate.

“There’s too many of them!” Emma shouted.

Giovanni and Alyssa had ended up guarding Molly and Emma from the sheep flying at them, and he replied, “I’m not sure if we can get them all before they nibble us to death!”

“I have an idea! It looked like he summoned these, so maybe I can,” Molly knelt next to one of the sheep and it slowly faded away. Much cooler looking than her little crowbar schtick, but there were still a ton of sheep.

Nevertheless, the rest of the group seemed distracted by the morals of it, while she kept sheep-hitting. At least until one that she missed jumped at Molly, and she watched as some of the dust floated towards her. Alyssa sighed as she felt her eyes get slightly heavier—not as heavy as Molly’s, though, as she nearly stumbled into Giovanni’s arms.

“You should be more than groggy enough now.” Oh, that guy was still here. “Let’s see what you’re most afraid of. Nightmare Fuel!”

The words were punctuated by a blaze that surrounded them. Molly immediately was panicking, and Alyssa was halfway down, about to start giving breathing techniques, when Molly latched herself into Giovanni’s cape. That would work too.

“Now, why don’t you all stay put until the police arrive?” He was too full of himself—he really was a SJU alum. 

A meek “help” from Molly pulled her back into the realm of the fire, though. She watched a quick exchange between Emma and Giovanni, expressed exclusively through eyebrows, vague gesturing, and thumbs ups, before Giovanni scooped Molly up.

“I’ve had just about enough of you, guy. No one makes my minions cry except me! I’ve never done this while holding someone, but…” A sidelong glance at Emma. “You’ll get me if this goes south?”

“‘Course, Gio. Get the kid out of here.” Emma nodded, and suddenly Giovanni was gone in a puff of steam, landing on the display by the so-called Fort Cool Guy.

Emma glanced at her. “It’s gonna be loud for a moment, that okay?” She held her guitar close to her chest.

“I guess? What are you going to—” She was interrupted by a loud guitar strum that put out the fire around them, and an epithet graphic popping up.

Emma Nolan

Epithet: Forte

Has the power of loud. And controlling sound waves. But mostly loud.

Stamina: ★★★

Proficiency: ★★★★

Creativity: ★★

“Aren’t there other interpretations of that word? Like, ones that would allow you to—” Alyssa was, again, cut off. This time, it was by another “Nightmare Fuel!” by Sylvie, and the bears coming to life. Why were the bears coming to life? Who was afraid of bears?

One of the bears started climbing the display that Giovanni and Bear Trap were on, and the other turned to them. “Well, well, well,” it rumbled. “I know all about you.”

“Uh- me, or her?” Emma asked, next to her.

“You know, I could out you in an instant. Epithet and all.” 

Alyssa let a shaky breath out. “Me. You couldn’t do that.”

“Actually,” the bear pulled a phone out of God knew where. “What’s the number?”

No. No. _No_. Alyssa glanced between the two bears. The other one was screaming at Giovanni, who was trying to hide Molly behind him, and the one in front of them was punching in numbers. There had to be a way to stop them, she just needed to—

Emma grabbed her hand. Warmth flooded her chest, and suddenly it hit her. There was a a gay reading in this.

_The bears had been yearning for each other since the moment they were placed in their display. For years and years, they had been so close, yet so far._ She watched them both pause. _And now that they were together, animated, why would they bother with anything else?_ The bear bothering Giovanni began to climb down, as the other one pocketed the phone. _They finally had each other, and that was what mattered._

And they were bear kissing. Giovanni yelled, “Gross!” as Molly began to watch. Emma looked at her, her hand still snugly held in Alyssa’s. “Did you…?”

“Yeah. It’s the gay interpretation of their characters.” Alyssa sighed. “It’s one of the few things I can do with my epithet.”

“It’s cool as hell, though. The bears really said ‘gay rights’.” Emma smiled at her, and she laughed. God, Emma had a pretty smile. It was worth it to have to use her epithet if she could get that smile to show up a bit more often.

And then a _thump_ , and Giovanni yelling, “Why is he still standing?!” to Emma.

She immediately replied with, “Looked like a good hit, boss!” and threw a thumbs up and then a shrug at him, causing her to let go of Alyssa’s hand. Alyssa missed that hand already.

“That’s it!” The kid looked beat-up, but fine. “You’ve forced my hand! No more Dr. Nice Guy! Dream Big!” And he screamed for a moment, before…

_Plonk_.

“That’s your ultimate attack? Passing out?” Alyssa watched him scoop Molly up again, laughing the whole time. “What a dork.”

A quick jump down, and they were all together again. “Let that be a lesson, dear Bear Trap—and Alyssa, as well.” He slung an arm around Emma, who leaned in and grinned. “Don’t mess with Giovanni Potage or Emma Nolan, because they’re both great.”

“Hey, Giovanni? High Note?” Molly asked, and Alyssa followed her eyes to—oh, Jesus Christ above. 

“Please, you can call me boss.”

“Boss?”

“Shit, Em, Giovanni, we’ve got a situation!” 

“Alyssa, you can use my minion name,” she and Giovanni turned around, and any end to that sentence died into a collective scream by the four of them.

“Tiny thieves may have defeated Dr. Ashling,” the giant Scottish (she assumed) bull in front of them rumbled out, “But they cannot defeat Dr. Beefton!”

In a world where they were not being terrorized by a Scottish bovine, she would appreciate Emma holding her. However, they were in a world where a Scottish bovine was saying that he had a PhD in death. And a doctorate of philosophy and modern linguistics.

Part of Alyssa immediately wanted to let out the scoff of a STEM major and say that his doctorate was useless, but the PhD in death was probably useful here. Also, she was about to die, so…

“Bear Trap! Can you unsummon that thing?”

“No! Hushabye only works on small creatures! I can’t fight something that big!”

“M-maybe we can sneak around him?” Giovanni asked, before Beefton nearly jumped on them all and they screamed again.

“Alyssa!” Emma looked at her. “Can you make him gay?”

“I can try!” She summoned her epithet powers and tried to make him fall in love with the bear, but, “There’s nothing else to make him fall in love with! Except Giovanni, maybe!”

“No chance!” Giovanni ripped the knife off his bat. “I’ll just hit him instead!” He let the knife go flying in a beautiful arc that did a total of -0 damage.

“Is that all?” The bovine actually _smirked_ , pulling the knife out of his abs. Jesus christ, he was fucking ripped. Alyssa had seen people school with worse-designed fursonas.

“Yeah, that didn’t work as well as expected. C-can I have the knife back? It’s my mom’s, and she would be really mad if I lost it.”

“Yeah, sure.” Emma immediately grabbed her arm, and she grabbed Molly’s, and they collectively were pulled out of the way.

“Thanks! For a second, I thought you were—” and a knife was thrown at him, “throwing it at me, oh geez!”

As it dug into the wall, Giovanni began rambling about knife things, which Emma seemed much more interested in than she was. She and Molly seemed to have similar ideas, scanning the doctor for weaknesses.

And there was Dr. Ashing, floating in him.

“Giovanni! I have an idea!” Molly yelled, then explaining the dream epithet, and how this guy was “one of his dreams”, aka a fursona.

And she was right on the money, as Beefton charged at her and completely took her out. Giovanni immediately tried to hit him with a bat, but the excess of abs was too untouchable.

“We gotta wake him up some other way! What wakes people up? Loud noises, water, light…”

“My mom…” Giovanni muttered.

“My gran…” Emma sighed.

“My roommate’s boyfriend…” If only Kevin was here. Surely his obnoxious footsteps and inability to not yell “Yo, Shelbs, good morning!” would save them!

“If we don’t figure out something, we’re doomed!” And then the Doctor was nearly on top of Molly.

“Wait!” Both her and Giovanni yelled at once, Beefton turning to them. They glanced at each other, and he gestured to allow her to go. “You seriously have a doctorate in Psychology and Modern Linguistics? Don’t you know those are both _fake degrees_?”

“The concept of fake degrees undermines the importance of non-STEM academics! All degrees are important in different ways!”

She looked at Emma and suddenly her voice was amplified as she muttered, “Yeah, but STEM degrees are cooler.”

And suddenly he was charging at them, barely clipping Giovanni and Emma, but slamming into Alyssa, who hit the ground, surrounded by turtles and lights.

“Emma! Go protect Bear Trap.” Alyssa unsteadily got up, watching Emma slide across the floor to assess the girl’s injuries. Giovanni held out a hand to help her up, and then looked at the ground. “Those poor turtles...they never stood a chance.”

“It looks like some of the lights came loose!” Molly was standing up as well, supported by Emma. “Try to shine them into his eyes!”

Both her and Giovanni dropped to the floor, testing stage lights, until they each found one that worked. “Take this!” They simultaneously turned on their lights and shined them at Beefton’s torso. She noted that Sylvie was nearly stirring, until Beefton closed his coat.

“Dang it! Why am I always getting screwed over by cloth?” Giovanni looked over at her. “Seriously, ask Emma. That stuff is crazy expensive at the craft store!

“I’ve had enough of this!” Beefton jumped over them and grabbed the two bears in his hands.

“I guess they’ll die as they lived…being used by academia to beat us over the head with subtext that was never actually confirmed.” Alyssa sighed. “The real homophobia was in the hands of the academics all along.”

“I just think it’s cool!” Giovanni stared, wide-eyed with awe until Beefton started screaming, and he backtracked with a “Less cool!”

And then bears slammed into them. Giovanni was screaming, she was screaming. Bears fucking _hurt_. But they didn’t hurt that much, due to her _pretty decent amount of Stamina_!

Giovanni looked terrible, though. He stepped out of the bear-range for a moment, chugging soup. She stumbled back as well, and he handed her the remains. She felt her stamina increase slightly, as a +3 popped up next to her.

“Ha! See! Your attacks have been nothing against us! What are you gonna do now, huh?” he taunted the doctor, who then hit them. Again. She lamented how stupid Giovanni was as she felt her stamina deplete.

“Beat Trap, bury me in a cocoon of dinosaur bones!” Giovanni yelled, and if this was the end of her, she might as well say something.

“Emma! You were pretty cool, and I would have liked to go out on a—”

**BEEP BEEP!**

THE TERRORS OF COLLEGE IMMEDIATELY HIT ALYSSA. _**WHO HAD SMOKED WEED WITHOUT BAGGING THE FIRE ALARM THIS TIME?!**_

**BEEP BEEP!**

JESUS CHRIST THIS WAS A LOUD FIRE ALARM.

“What is that?!” Beefton covered his ears.

“It’s a fire alarm!” Emma grinned as she walked up. “Molly found it, and I amplified it! She’s in her cool silence bubble right now because of her misophonia.”

The bubble dropped for a moment, as Molly smiled and said, “Pulling these outside of an actual fire is a crime! But I’m a criminal now. So it’s okay!” Emma gently ruffled the girl’s hair as she put the bubble back up.

No!” Beefton yelled as he faded away, leaving Dr. Ashling plopped on the ground.

Giovanni laughed and got up. “Good job, Bear Trap, High Note.” She got up as well, stretching slightly. He came over and elbowed her. “It’s a good thing your health gets refilled instantly after you win a battle! I’m pretty sure my bones were super broken.”

She laughed. “Yeah, same.” 

And then the fire alarm’s volume dropped, as Molly chirped a “Thank you!” to Emma and went to turn the fire alarm off.

“How?” Dr. Ashling looked up at them. “I’ve never been defeated before!”

“That’s just what happens,” he threw an arm around her shoulders, doing the same with Emma. “When you mess with the Banzai Blaster elite!” He grinned as Molly walked back up. “You’re all promoted!”

“Yay!” Molly smiled. God, Alyssa wanted her to smile more, it was adorable.

“That also means your membership fee has been upped to 100 bucks a month!” Oh no, she was a poor college student who wasn’t even in the pyramid scheme! She couldn’t afford that!

“I don’t have that kind of money…” Molly sighed.

“But your family owns a store! Doesn’t that mean you’re super rich?” Giovanni leaned in, genuinely curious.

Molly and Alyssa made eye contact, and sighed over the horrors of capitalism.

Meanwhile, Dr. Ashling tried to crawl away as Emma grabbed his leg, keeping him in place. “I can’t let you all take the amulet!”

“What do you mean?” Molly came over and looked at him. “That tour guide lady is the one who wants to take the amulet.”

_Oh thank God no one knew that she wanted to steal the amulet she didn’t need to tell anyone about it she just needed to not open her mouth—_ ”Uh, actually, about that…”

“I didn’t come here for a stupid necklace! I came here for mummies and dinosaur eggs,” Giovanni walked towards the boy.

“And maybe a cursed sword we could throw at girls.” Emma added.

“Yeah! We didn’t even know it existed at all until she was all like, ‘ooh, I’m going to take your epithet. Ooh, look at me!’ Stupid jerk.” Giovanni stuck his tongue out as Emma looked over at him.

“That was what happened while I was gone?” She seemed less surprised than she needed to be, to be honest. There was someone else after the amulet? God, she needed to get it.

“Yeah! It was crazy!” Giovanni began whispering to Emma, probably explaining it.

Dr. Ashling watched, declaring, “You can’t expect me to believe that!” 

“Well I kind of was,” Alyssa tried to add, before being interrupted.

“It’s true. They were digging through a bunch of museum property when we found them. And then they imprisoned us!”

“What.” Emma deadpanned, looking at Giovanni.

“She specifically said that she ‘wanted to steal my epithet.’” Molly said. Oh, God, the evil reason to steal the amulet!

“So you’re saying I’ve been tricked?” Dr. Ashling seemed incredulous. This was all wild, she was just supposed to get the amulet and run. None of these people were supposed to be here!

“Yeah, but that’s alright! Now we can all work together to try and stop her!” If Alyssa could just get the amulet before this chick stole Molly’s epithet, then everything would be fine. Or if she could just get her epithet taken…

“Are you kidding? I’m a highly trained epithet user who graduated college and became a psychologist at the age of 15! Like I would ever cooperate with criminal scum like you!” Oh yeah, no, he was an SJU alum.

“I want to hit him.” Giovanni got his bat out.

“No, wait!” Molly grabbed his arm. “I work in retail! Most of my job is not hitting people, even when they deserve it!”

“Wait, really?” Emma grinned at her. “Bear Trap, I do retail too!”

“So you know! When you’re nice to people they tend to be nice back.” They all turned to Dr. Ashling. “Hello!” Molly smiled warmly at him. He raspberried at them.

“So, like, bud, do you have any friends?” Emma asked.

“No.” He proudly grinned, and both Giovanni and Emma let out a quiet “oh.”

“I’ll be your friend.” Molly was the bravest among them.

“Fat chance.” He sounded actually awkward. “I’m not interested in working with criminals who would defile academia.”

Oh, this was her chance to save the day! She stepped towards him. _Just don’t mention that you want the amulet, Alyssa._ “So, uh, actually! I’m not a criminal! I’m just a poor college student—actually, I’m majoring in psychology as well, I want to help kids deal with shitty family lives and epithet issues—who wants the amulet to take my epithet!”

_Shit._ Beat.

“Wait, you want your epithet gone? That’s the problem?” Emma asked. “I thought it was something cool, like cursed-sword related!”

“Nah, I just want it gone.” She awkwardly rubbed her hand behind her head. “It kind of outs me whenever anyone figures it out!”

“Okay, that’s valid but crappy! I’m sorry you have to go through that!” Emma came up and touched her shoulder.

“Why would I work with someone who wants their epithet gone, though? That’s even worse than petty theft!” 

“It’d be cool for research, though!” Alyssa grinned. “Help us out, Dr. Ashling. Please?”

“A-and also, I hate to point this out, but…” Molly gestured around them at the destroyed room.

“Oh, come on!” Dr. Ashling ran towards the absolutely destroyed turtle display. “Beefton did all that? I don’t have full control over Dream Big when I’m sleeping…”

Giovanni ran up and they got into an argument, with Molly going over to calm them down, and Emma looked at her.

“You really want your epithet gone? Because it outs you?” She seemed more inquisitive than anything.

“Yeah. And I don’t want my mom to know that I’m...y’know…”

Emma nodded. “Yeah. My parents kicked me out when they found out about everything. Though, I don’t think your epithet is the problem here. It sounds more like your family is.”

“Yeah, but—”

“You only won because those two girls were here!” Dr. Ashling was pointing between Molly and Emma.

“We can talk about it later, alright?” Alyssa asked, and Emma sighed and nodded before they walked over.

“Both of them are my minions, and thus extensions of my power!”

“Uh, guys? I hate to be the bear trap of bad news, but- well, I guess there’s good news and bad news. Good news, the fire alarm went off,” she walked over to one of the fire alarms, “so the building is up to code!”

“That’s good! Safety’s very important.” Giovanni said.

“Until it wakes you up in the middle of the night in winter.” Alyssa muttered.

“Bad news, the fire alarm went off, which means the police are coming.” 

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Her mom was going to kill her. Emma was suddenly breathing much more intensely next to her, a fact that both her and Giovanni seemed to note.

“Well, that’s fine!” Giovanni’s voice was a bit more high pitched than thus far. “We’ll just grab the amulet, grab the boys, and get out. It’ll be okay. Okay?” He looked over at Emma, who sighed.

“Okay. Let’s go get an amulet and save the boys.” And, hopefully, get her epithet taken. Making bears gay was cool, but there were bigger issues in her life than bears, and she needed them dealt with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alyssa greene put her epithet in the water and turned the bears gay.  
> anyway follow me on tumblr @revivetheprom

**Author's Note:**

> so that's...the beginning. thanks for reading and all that jazz! my tumblr's @revivetheprom if you wanna scream about the prom, or ee, or really anything!


End file.
